Live Metanoia

I’ve been thinking a lot about psychology lately. About how or when we stop accepting full grown adults excuses for how or why they are the way they are, and when the stopped making them responsible for their own actions. 

We have made people believe that their actions are the end results of their circumstances, and that they cannot rise above them, that there’s always some excuse as to their behavior, there’s always a why -however, I believe when you become an adult, and you are given the opportunity to change, the opportunity to grow, and the opportunity to learn, these excuses, if you grew up this way, or another, are no longer relevant. There is a means to do better, to be better, and people just don’t take it.

We have cultivated a culture of victimization, whereas adults we do not take responsibility for our own actions or our own feelings. It is our responsibility to fix ourselves, to seek healthy alternatives to what we suffer from or better ourselves for not only our selves but for others around us. It is our responsibility to not blame others for situations we put ourselves in, and to grow and sometimes, heal. If you’re an adult and you don’t take responsibility for your actions, how is anybody else supposed to learn and grow when they are constantly around you while you victimize yourself.  How do you have healthy friendships, relationships, family ties? 

The answer is you don’t. 

As I have slowly de-transitioned from a social media focused lifestyle, deleting many apps and now only having one (which I also may delete this year), I have become more aware of how psychologically damaging they are and what we as a society have become. 

Guys pardon my language, but we have become some needy mother fuckers. 

I know that sounds crass, but honestly think about it. We scroll facebook, instagram, ticktock, youtube for hours on end for minutes of entertainment. These apps that are literally created to condition our brains to send out the happy hits of serotonin or dopamine or whichever neurotransmitter gives you a high. We post our lives, forgoing our privacy for likes, comments, and shares. Our information is harvested, and we have to request these apps to receive a copy of it. Of our own information we freely gave that is ours in the first place. It’s stored forever in servers, and depending on the app, sold to corporations and countries. This isn’t conspiracy theory dribble. This is a fact. No one reads the Terms and Conditions when signing up for these apps. But it’s in there. Our data on our phones become accessible. These apps ask to use your microphones, cameras, and have access to your photo albums. 

Friends, this isn’t normal. This is not natural human behavior. We are literally conditioning ourselves to need others approval and are acting like drug addicts. I fear for how blindly addicted people have become. 

Some use the excuse, “It’s how I keep up with my friends and family.” Um, sweet summer child, you have a phone and phone number. If you only ‘keep up’ with friends and family through social media and do not meet in person or talk to each other on the phone then you’re not ‘keeping up’ with anything. You are going through the motions. It’s lazy and nosey at the same time. This weird form of app fed friendships and relationships is not normal or healthy. 

People are posting crazy things on social media now a days to stay relevant. The term ‘clout chasing’ has stood out in the forefront of my mind many times. How many times have you read something someone shared or posted that you know personally, and know that they are full of lies? How many times have you yourself shared a post about ‘not being perfect’ or ‘Just a mom trying’ or something else that’s attention seeking to get a response from others?? 

I’m not disillusioned enough to not admit I have done it. Everyone has.

Can social media be good? 

Honestly, I thought it had merits once upon a time. Now all I want is to disappear. There’s ads, reels, stories, shops, and marketplaces, and blah blah blah to get you to try and stay on them. People have become dependent to it. And we make excuses instead of just admitting the truth. And really the truth is all I ask for, it’s all I want. But there is no longer truth in social media. There’s ‘what can get me likes, follows, and influencer credit?’. People are literally plugged into the matrix, except we don’t need a jack at the base of our skulls, it’s the smart phone in our hand. 

I stated it earlier, but honestly now of days I just want to disappear. I am tired of keeping up with it all. There’s an algorithm to all these things and if you don’t play your cards right, if you don’t yell along with the rest of everyone about how you love Big Brother (1984 reference) then you become invisible anyway. 

I want texting and talking on the phone back. I want meeting in person and making plans  and to follow through with these plans back. I want people to own to their mistakes instead of looking for others to validate their excuses. I want people to try for one another and instead of saying ‘This is just the way I am’. 

Are we really as a society going to just look for easy acceptance for disintegrating character? So if everyone is canceling plans, and making excuses, and whining on the internet you have to do it as well? 

I don’t understand how easily we have became this. How easily we have been manipulated.  

I worry for our future sometimes. I don’t have children, but I worry for children. They are even more addicted to the screen and social media. But as long as we as adults make excuses for the behavior, the “ I monitor screen time,” or “ Just when they are eating or we are in public”, we continue to be the problem, spread the problem to our future generations, and nothing will change. 

This honestly was supposed to be more focused on adults, current times in our society, about how we aren’t taking responsibility for our actions, but has morphed into something else, and honestly I’m not upset about this posts outcome. 

I hope reading it has made you think. That’s honestly the only goal I have for these posts, to get all the noise in my head out, and hopefully make whoever reads this open their eyes to a different perspectives. Maybe even make a change for the better, or realize they need to do something else- because friends, what we are doing now isn’t working. 

My Journey Continues

Kaycee